Forty

Forty weeks.

Nine (plus) months.

It's my due date.

Things I did today: woke up at 5am, obsessively checked the weather since we are about to have an epic blizzard, showered, did the dishes, 3 loads of laundry, scrubbed the kitchen, dusted, attempted to sew (but was thwarted by my machine and my lack of sewing knowledge, more to come on this later), took a brisk walk around the neighborhood, had lunch with Jessica, walked the dog, went to my 40 week midwife appointment, made a non-stress test appointment for tomorrow and updated my insurance info with the hospital, braved the craziness that is Target the day before an epic blizzard, walked the dog again, made myself dinner, and sat down on my exercise ball from Aldi birth ball to watch TV and blog.

Things I did not do today: go into labor.

I am currently 2cm dilated, almost completely effaced, and the baby's head is low and engaged. I have a "very favorable cervix" for a first time mom according to my midwife, which is now my second favorite pregnancy compliment - first is "you still don't look pregnant from behind". Obviously. (Pregnancy compliments are funny because really what control do you have over those things? Step away from the junk food and if your body still feels like making you look pregnant from behind, that's not going to be something you can change. But it still makes me feel all warm and skinny inside). Anyways, she felt confident I would not be back for a 41 week appointment and would have a baby at this time next week. To say that I feel pretty strongly about that myself would be an understatement.

So in the morning, I'll have the non-stress test and an amniotic fluid index to check to make sure baby girl is still living in a luxurious, well-oxygenated uterus (right above that favorable cervix. Literally...right above. So go on, baby. Head on out). As long as she is happy and snug medically speaking, we just keep waiting. Of course if she is anything like her father, she'll take her sweet, sweet time planning for departure while people around her start to go crazy with the slowness of it all. And when it comes to this baby, I am literally the person around her. Going crazy.

The one thing I am really happy about is that our daughter avoided being born on the same day as one of our 8 million friends and relatives who have mid to late January birthdays. I'm glad that she will have her own special February day to celebrate.

So to sum up: my day was incredibly busy yet did not include birthing a child. Tomorrow, tomorrow, you're only a day (2.5 hours actually) away. And yay for February. More updates to come.

Quiet

One of the things I really like about working the night shift are the quiet days I have before I work. Yes, I should sleep more. Over the past two years it's actually only gotten harder to take naps or sleep in so I'm really rested to stay up all night. But I have gotten better about accomplishing little odds and ends, hanging out on the couch and watching cable (because all those things are just so difficult). I have such a rough life.

I only have nine shifts before my due date, and only six of those are overnights. If I work two in a row, obviously I do manage to sleep in between, so I guess I have maybe two or three of these "rest" days left. I've spent this one doing my nails, writing thank you notes for baby girl presents, drinking my raspberry leaf uterus-strengthening tea (I have mixed feelings on this one), snuggling with my sweet animals, and hoping I just spontaneously go into labor and actually have no shifts left (it's looking unlikely).

I know I could be doing so many more productive things with my time. The obvious one being sleeping all day when I have to stay up all night. Actually, I am waiting for that nesting thing to happen - now that the baby's room is basically done and our hospital bags are as packed as possible, I'm just going to relax until I am suddenly hit by that crazy burst of energy (that everyone has promised me will happen) to do things like dust the blinds and scrub the kitchen floors. And if it doesn't happen...well, I think I can justify a few more days of guilt-free How I Met Your Mother marathons.

sugar and spice

With all the craziness of moving, working, the holidays, parties, Christmas shopping, and so on, I don't think we have really wrapped our mind around the idea that our baby girl is going to be here in a month and a half. While I am ready to say goodbye to my new friend acid reflux, and momentarily losing my breath everytime I put on or take my shoes off, I still can't believe how fast the time is going. A month and a half ago seems like yesterday, so really I think we are going to blink and wonder how it's possible that we now have a screaming human on our hands.But just because the time is flying and we have packed schedules doesn't mean we aren't getting ready for her arrival. Between an overabundance of baby showers (seriously, this girl is spoiled), and our own excitement to research and pick out the very best baby products, her room and her 'stuff' is gradually starting to come together.
Last night Joshua and Jakob built the crib, and by next week we will have her changing table. Her room has been used as a storage area since we moved in, and the huge bookshelf that is currently housing overflow decorations and a flatscreen TV needs to go somewhere else. The rapidly filling closet needs to be organized, her clothes need to be washed, and we are missing a few significant odds and ends - the most important being that she currently has no place to sleep in our room when we come home. (But don't worry, this January baby's super swanky stroller is all assembled and ready to go...nowhere, if the weather is anywhere near as cold as it is now when she arrives).

I also have to confess that I am overwhelmed by all the pink that having a little girl apparently brings. Not that we haven't bought into it ourselves, with her tulip crib bedding, but I think this child owns approximately four things that don't fall somewhere on the rose-to-fuschia spectrum. Joshua and I were both pretty convinced this baby was going to be a boy, so I just keep thinking how hilarious it will be if the little karate kid we keep calling she turns out to actually be a he. I think its unlikely after two very convincing ultrasounds but of course, everyone knows someone who knows someone who had a teeny weinie surprise at the birth.

I happen to think Joshua looks great in the one pink dress shirt that he owns, but I am pretty sure I'd feel funny bringing home a boy and sticking him straight into this crib. Only (a very short amount of) time left until we meet our baby daughter - who is hopefully just as sweet and girly and happy to wear pink as everyone else is to gift it to her in any way possible!

Grateful

Thanksgiving has passed but before it's too far behind us I really wanted to take some time to mention what Joshua and I are so thankful for this year...

- The gift of each other. We are so blessed to have celebrated FIVE years of marriage this past May. I'm thankful every day that we met when we were so young and that we've been able to grow up together without growing apart. At our (granola crunch style) childbirth classes this past weekend, we were asked to share the story of how we met and fell in love. This was an unexpected detour in between graphic homebirth videos, and we were surprised by how much fun it was to talk about our wild little teenage romance. We've come so far from those first crazy months of long-distance phone calls, cross country plane trips, 2000 mile roadtrips and lugging our physical and emotional baggage all across America. Our life now might not seem as spontaneous and passionate as it did when we were 19 and 20 and writing (bad) poetry and running off to Chicago together, but it is so much richer and deeper and more fulfilling than I could have ever expected back then. Every day that we have together is a gift and I never want to lose sight of that!

-The gift of our baby. Joshua and I weren't one of those couples who have a few extra drinks, tumble home and fastforward a few weeks to a totally shocking positive pregnancy test. A baby was prayed for and planned for (and cried over, let's be serious) before this baby became a reality. It's hard to put into words how grateful we are that after that struggle, I've had an incredibly uneventful and healthy pregnancy and we are only 9 weeks away from welcoming our daughter into the world. I wake up every day thankful for her jabs and rolls and karate kicks, all of which take my breath away. Sometimes because a swift punch to the ribs hurts like hell, but always because it means she is real, and we are incredibly grateful for the intense experience and privilege of becoming parents.

-The gift of our jobs. We both love what we do. Not every day is a great day at the office or the hospital, and sometimes when things at work are stressful we forget to be thankful for our careers. (Last night when my patient's ostomy bag came off twice and she was screaming bloody murder, and my other patient decided to start hollering at that moment for a bottle, I would not say that I was particularly happy about my choice of poop-covered workplace). But when we step back and look at the people we work with, the experiences we get to have, and the fact that we do totally different things that are perfectly fitted to our personalities, we know we are blessed. We have job security, we have benefits, we have so many opportunities to be challenged by our work and make a difference in the lives of people around us.

-The gift of our families. We both have intact, supportive, loving and slightly crazy families who have been there for us every step of our lives. We're thankful for that every day, and especially at the holidays. This fall my cousin Cari moved from Massachusetts to live with us in Chicago (she sweetly shares her room here with our emotionally disturbed cat Hala, who would like to say that for Thanksgiving she is grateful we got her an extra human). Cari is hilarious and incredibly thoughtful and helpful and even sobbed at my last midwife's appointment when she heard the baby's heartbeat. Which of course made me cry because I can't overexaggerate how happy I am to have someone from my side of the family here after the six years I've spent 1000 miles away from everyone I grew up with. It's been one of the best seasons of my life so far.

The gift of our friends. We have great friendships that we've built over our almost six years in Chicago. Some of our friends here are actually my elementary school friends from Massachusetts that have migrated here over the years (yes I take lots of credit for this). Some of our friends are Joshua's college friends from the year when he lived in Colorado. Some of our friends are our college friends from here in the city. Some are our work friends, some have slipped in through roommates and friends and family of other friends, and all I can say is that they are all wonderful and our lives are so much better for knowing them. Joshua looked around the room at our baby shower last weekend and said to me, "I really really love everyone here." And we do.

-The gift of our home. We can say for certain that after almost a month of living in our condo (pictures are COMING SOON, I promise!) that this is exactly where we are supposed to be. It's both cozy and spacious, easy to keep clean, perfect for us and our animals and getting closer to being ready for baby girl. We have already made lots of wonderful memories here and I know there will be so many many more.

There are a hundred more things I could say (I'm thankful for my zoo! Joshua made me dinner tonight and just did the dishes! My fancy dream stroller is being delivered this week! I don't have any stretch marks yet! My mom is coming into town this weekend and I'm finally going to decorate for Christmas!) but I think the most important thing is to continue living our everyday lives thankful for all that we have been given. I know there will be years where things are much more difficult and don't fall into place as beautifully as they have in 2010. There will be times when we struggle in our marriage and struggle as parents and and as friends and just in general don't wake up as excited about life as we do these days.

So that's what this list is for - to look at on the crappy days when the baby is screaming and the cat throws up on the rug and the dog is chewing happily away on Joshua's favorite hat and the fridge is empty and I have the flu. We have been blessed with so much, and we are so thankful for it.

Hello, Internet. You missed me, right?

Well! This is the first post of my third blog. The first two fizzled out due to a total lack of riveting content, so I have done my best to make our lives more interesting over the past few years in order to have something to whine about on the internet.

Just kidding!

Hopefully, I will actually use this blog to keep our friends and family updated on our lives. We have decided to go all out this year in terms of making the leap to incredibly responsible adulthood, and I thought our loved ones might be interested in laughing at us supporting us as we experience the brand new challenges of homeownership and parenthood in the next few months.

We have a fairly busy schedule planned for now until the end of January, which includes but is not limited to: packing up our entire apartment and moving into our new condo when I'm six months pregnant, unpacking into a new place, the entire whirlwind of the winter holidays, and then birthing an actual human. I think it all sounds overwhelming, but they tell me that last one is a doozy.

After that, we don't plan on acquiring any new animals, homes, or children for quite a while.

We both plan to post on this blog (I will be as interested as anyone else to see if Joshua follows through on that), and we definitely plan on being very honest about all the challenges and joys we experience during this crazy period of transition. So do we advise moving 2 cats, a dog, 3,127 lbs of books and furniture a few weeks before Thanksgiving and 3 months before your first baby is due? We agree, it sounds like a terrible idea. Check this site soon for details.

It's good to be back, Internet!